THE NEW NEW

I've been wondering when it will become trendy to buy something new.
As in modern, unique, never been seen before. Because it can only be a matter of time before retro is out of date. New will be the new new and old will no longer be new but positively dated.
If you get what I mean?!
But I have to admit I have always been a sucker for old style, retro trainers.
Very clever. Makes me feel like a teenager again (although does that mean that they make a teenager feel like an old git??)
Take an old design, jazz up it's image as 'cool' and hey presto. Instant fucking wad of notes in the bank.
And no designer to pay.
But I bet not even the top brains in Adidas could have really believed we would go for the 'Stan Smith'.
Not that there is anything wrong with the trainer.
But if you were asked to name a high profile sporting icon from the 70's, Stan bloody Smith isnt exactly the first name that springs to mind.

I suppose it's well done to Adidas for getting away with it.

But the cold truth is...

THE MAN IS FUCKING BALD!!

With a moustache.

Like the stereotypical 1973 German porn star. But with better trainers.



The Original Stan Smith

And the Original Stan Smiths

Only one of them is good to look at....

Now if Adidas had any sense, they would bring out 'The Nastase'.....
Because there you have a real tennis God. Dark, brooding and good looking, with a great sense of humour and a mean player to boot.
In comparison to Stan Smith, he was a womanizing, champagne swigging, bad tempered nasty bastard. Just the kind of bloke we can relate to. And as opposed to asking for the whereabouts of your Stan Smith's, wouldn't it be so much cooler to be able to say "Where the fuck's me Nasties??".

"Listen, I'll wear what the fuck I want on my feet, o.k.??"

FOOTNOTE: If retro is so cool, why is my Nokia 3210 so fucking funny?

Listen, fashion muppets, one day you'll be fucking weeping 'cos you wished you could change your plastic cover for a different colour. You mark my words.......