ORDINARY BLOKE v's ORDINARY BLOKE

It started back in October.

Find out what all this "Blog" nonsense is about, sort out a decent title, and have a go.

But the blog had to have a point (of sorts!). So I was delighted - not to say amazed - to find that the address "Ordinary Bloke Down The Pub" had not yet been used. It seemed perfect for a blog that intended to air all the subjects you'd find blokes (and blokesses) ranting on about down your local boozer. In fact, it seemed not far short of total fucking genius!!

But then I became a lazy twat and did nothing for months - well, there was Christmas and all that.

So finally getting off my arse and posting something, it was all excitedly that I typed Ordinary Bloke into Google, expecting to see the one and only Ordinary Bloke Down The Pub popping up at the top of the list.

And what did I get??

Steve bloody Irwin!!

Now, there's nothing wrong with Steve Irwin. I quite liked him.

But ORDINARY BLOKE?

You are having a fucking laugh!

I've wrestled a few Mooses in my time (reminder to self - YOU CANNOT HANDLE KRONENBOURG) and had to fight off the odd pig or two after one too many, but CROCODILES? AND SNAKES??

Don't be silly......

Left is Ordinary Bloke Down The Pub posing outside a bar on holiday.

Nothing more dangerous than the odd stray dog (nothing a well aimed brick can't sort out) and the occassional bothering of the beach vendor (honest, I can't carry money in these shorts!).

Right is Steve Irwin - not quite the same ordinary bloke as above, I think you'll agree (although the crocodile doesn't look that fucking scary to me!).

Now I admit there is an uncanny resemblance that could be an episode of Who Do You Think You Are? all in itself. And I'm sure you're wondering if Steve Irwin looks as good in the old "Englishman Abroad" vest as the Ordinary Bloke Down The Pub.

But I do have to admit that he would have been a lot more use to you down by some Australian river bank than I would. And let's face it, probably a lot more use to you outside the Kebab van at midnight as well!

But ordinary? Sorry, Steve.

You were a top bloke.

Cool and Funny.

And you look almost as good in shorts.

But ordinary - I'm afraid not.

And believe me - that's not such a bad thing!

P.S. The Ordinary Bloke search also threw up David Cameron. I like it. Google has a sense of fucking humour.

Pass me my gun.......